Tut, Tut: It wasn’t murder

New DNA studies recently announced have confirmed the cause of death for the mysterious boy king of Egypt, Tutankhamen. Scientists found evidence of severe malaria, possibly brought on by a broken leg. As it turns out, Tut was a sickly lad who probably walked only with the aid of crutches during his brief and tragic life. (And given that there were no PCs back then, he probably went his entire life without seo software, either!)

Testing further confirmed his parentage as the son of notorious Egyptian monotheist, Akhenaten, and his mother one of Akhenaten’s sisters.

Tut also suffered from a cleft palate, Kohler’s disease, and a club foot, according to the study; Akhenaten dealt with a cleft palate, while Tut’s grandfather also had a club foot. Like his father, Tut married one of his sisters. It is believed the dynasty Tut was part of passed down such afflictions like this because of too much inter-marriage.

One affliction Tut and his family did not suffer from, however, was Marfan Syndrome, an affliction that can elongate limbs and lend a feminine appearance to males.

Algore, however, has denounced the study, insisting Tut was, “the world’s first victim of global warming.”

Whatever, Al…